It swings violently back and forth or explodes suddenly. For many, emotions during a competition can ruin the fun of their neighborhood friends. As a coaching authority for more than 25 years, the author will discuss the nature of the problem, how professional athletes deal with it, and offer some concrete ways that overly competitive players can soothe feelings that are damaging to “game time” and our emotions!
We’ve all seen this happen to an individual during competition. Oftentimes it is the males who exhibit these behaviors. The reasons are due to both nature and nurture, but this discussion will remain non-specific to sex.
Often, it starts with the player starting to complain or whine that “things aren’t going my way today.” Frustration builds gradually while playing a team sport or an individual sport such as table tennis, tennis or racquetball. Suddenly explode.
A bat flies, a ball sails over a fence or worse, a friend or acquaintance becomes a target. A person who is generally nice by nature suddenly changes during a competition.
Due to the huge number of competitions, this rarely happens to professionals. Those who make a living in sports, especially individual sports, have made some significant “emotional adjustments,” often with outside help. They do this because they have to be competitive, to make a living.
Unfortunately, players in fun games are often unlucky to get outside help or forced to change. This article will explore some of the behind-the-scenes “emotional adjustments” that professionals do, but first, it’s helpful to take a look at which character needs it and the exact reasons for doing it.
Victims of Ping Pong Emotions usually see themselves as an overachiever, often working in a competitive 9-to-5 environment. The recreational sport of their choice, be it table tennis, tennis, or basketball, is a passion that deserves just as much intensity as they do. Bring to each task. The result of each individual effort in that competition is a measure of achievement, and a test of self-esteem.
A psychologist might call them “over-reactive” or what used to be called a classic “Type A personality.” Tactically speaking, in tennis and other sports, there are many great reasons to stay calm on the court that are not personal. This is why tennis pros, for example, make an effort to change because showing negative emotions costs them matches and a lot of money.
First, emotions are not the enemy here. Every human being has it. The task here is to keep them productive, not destroy them. Recreational players, like professionals, should briefly celebrate successes on key stages in a competition. In tennis especially, some points are more important than others, and some are critical. Creating positive emotional expressions after an important sequence helps create momentum, but negative emotions are best masked for tactical reasons and limited to personal reasons.
Tactically, showing negative emotions encourages your opponent and gives him tactical tips. He gives them what a poker player calls “tell”. The strategy against someone who is desperate, or on the verge of an emotional breakdown, is different from the strategy a great competitor might choose if the opponent seems stable.
The best competitors keep a “poker face,” a look-alike action. Essentially, a tennis match should be played like a game of polite poker with no ‘tell’. Celebrate winning a Big Bet, but get back to work afterward.
In a team sport, such as doubles tennis, your team’s success requires that you maintain a positive, collaborative, and encouraging attitude in the face of adversity—at all times. Anything less than that is destructive behavior for your teammates, and by extension, your team. The coach shall bench any player whose behavior is detrimental to the team. Simple enough?
You and your partner/colleague are in this together. Humans read body language very well. Slouching shoulders, turning away from them, or biting your lips when they fail to harm the team. Great coach, tennis champion, and sports psychologist Dr. Allen Fox says that if you flinch when your partner makes a mistake it’s because you feel insecure.
Errors and inaccuracies are inevitable. Great teams are measured by how they move forward afterwards. Great mates always encourage their partners after something goes wrong for two big reasons. First, the team will need to perform better than that person as quickly as possible. Second, if roles are reversed, you may want to be supported and treated as if you are valuable and about to play better at a moment’s notice.
It is important to realize that outward signs of frustration isolate and confuse your teammate(s). It makes them feel powerless to help you. Then after they have that feeling, they have to execute right and who wants to do that? Yak!
Since outward signs of frustration are hurting your team, that in and of itself should be added motivation. Take the necessary steps to calm the reaction during the competition. In the next article in this series, we will examine the concrete methods that large competitors use to do this.